If you’re in my past,
stay in my past. There’s
a reason you’re not

with me anymore,
you know that, right?
The sad thing is,

I don’t think you
have any clue how
much abuse you

put me through,
and I hate you for
that. I hate you

for choosing me
as your source of
strength. Who

the hell do you
think I am? I’m a
weak person, I

can barely take
care of myself, much
less you too.

You can’t hurt
me like that then
expect me to

just take you
back into my life.
Stay in the past.

I want to go back

to the times
when I saw the
beauty in everyone,
when everyone was my
friend until they gave me
a reason that they shouldn’t
be. I miss my innocence. I truly
don’t intend to sound the way that
I do. I don’t want to hurt anyone, not
the way that I’m all too familiar with being
hurt. I miss my innocence. I miss my friendliness.
I miss the times when no one would call me a bitch
behind my back. Really, I miss myself. Where have I gone?

I feel
the need to
clarify that I’m
not an unhappy
person.  My life isn’t
bad at all, in all honesty.
I have a nice family, a few
good friends, an extremely
caring boyfriend; everything
that a teenage girl wants, right?
You’d think that with all that I have
now, I’d be able to escape from
the past.  Things are pretty
grand, after all.  Nothing
from that past of mine
is still here with me
now, so why can’t
I clear my mind?
I want to start
over, can I,
please?

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For your own purposes, however,
you can call me Hope.
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